A day in the life...

What is it like when a missionary is back in the States? 

Sounds like it would be a bit of a vacation, right? Then again, some people think that our time in France was a vacation too.  Hmmm.... something doesn't line up with this sort of thinking - Maybe because it's not a vacation (though we do plan times for that.)

So what do you do while on Home Assignment (Furlough or Time back in the States)?

1. We TRAVEL. (But wait? Don't you travel enough already?! Umm - yes.)

We're like nomads to some extent. We travel from state to state, staying with friends or family for a night here and there, sharing in churches and small gatherings along the way. People always ask us where we are from and where we live. Sometimes we tell them where we grew up and then that we are currently traveling and staying with friends. They would just give us that blank stare with their heads tilted to the side when we tell them that we have no home and all we own is on it's way to Africa or packed in our van (this time - last time we had a car!).  Thankfully, we are bunked down for a few months with friends while we travel to nearby states to share so we don't actually have to live out of our rental van.  We are SO thankful for a place to stay so we can have some stability.  Lots of people ask us why we do this sort of traveling. It's because we know people and supporters from Texas to Florida to New York to Ohio to Illinois and back down to Texas. (We don't even usually get a chance to make it to the West coast to see other friends and supporters.) It's a big circuit!

2. We actually do WORK - from "home." There's lots of prep work for life overseas.

You think you have a lot of emails to catch up on, well so do we! Mainly because we don't always have internet access & our main form of communicating with supporters is through email and newsletters and blog updates. Brent mainly responds to email and I run the blog and take photos & edit our newsletters. We also have to prepare tailor-made PowerPoint presentations and sermons sometimes. It's a large task to accurately portray another culture, one we're headed to but have not been to yet. It requires research. We also answer lots of questions & try to write hand-written Thank-you notes to our many partners.
Currently, we are comparing our packing lists (4 of them!) to make sure all that we need for Africa is there or on it's way via our suitcases. We have lists of what we sent by container, what we purchased from 2 in-country missionaries, and what remains to be brought (OTC meds and personal items for 2 years). We get our physicals, shots, passports, visas, etc. in line. Oh, and if that doesn't seem like enough, we home school two kids.

3. We CRY tears of sorrow and joy.

It's amazing to return to your homeland after a year in another culture and language. We get to see our family and friends & meet people's new babies. We say "goodbye" to our moms and dads and grandparents and siblings and cousins for two years when we leave them, even though we just came back from being away for a year. We get to know so many friends' families better when we stay with them. We went to a Memorial Day party at my friends' aunt's house and I just cried. It was picturesque Americana! Something I had missed terribly while we were in France. We had a 4th of July party with some other Americans in France last year and it was close but not the same. You can't get yellow mustard there. French people were asking us what we were doing. It was great but odd. What a sense of relief I felt as I shared Memorial Day this year with Americans, some of whom were Veterans. I thought to myself, I will miss this for the next two years. Not much will be the same in Africa.We are all excited, but sometimes we feel sad knowing our kids will miss out on things like Little League. We are so filled with joy to see our kids turn into happy little travelers who can get along with anyone and adapt to almost any new situation with little trepidation.

4. We RELAX and do some family maintenance.

We, just like you, get overwhelmed or stressed out or tired or even sick. We have had to learn to add in times of rest and fun as a family in our travels. I personally need to sit and do a craft or read a book to relax a bit. Our kids need to watch a family film now and then. Brent and Ethan need to get outside to play sports. We need to soak in time with the Lord as we listen to praise music. We all need to sleep and take times to unwind. There is a lot of stress that comes with transitioning between cultures and being in a constant state of upheaval (think of how many times we have to pack and unpack!).

Please keep us in your prayers as we find balance.

This missionary life is hard 

even though it's the adventure of a lifetime!

I often ask myself, "WILL IT BE WORTH IT?"

Imagine if ...

• You were illiterate. 

That means right now you would not know what you were looking at. Someone would be reading it aloud to you. Do you remember the days when you didn't know how to read & what it felt like when you learned?

• Your language had no writing system - No alphabet.

That means you would never have a way to write down anything important. There would be no written signs (other than just pictures) indicating important cautions. You would have no way to send a letter to family far away. You would have no way of applying for a better job - you'd likely have a hard time just scraping by.

•  You did not have access to a Bible in your own language. 

Photo courtesy of the Seed Company.

That means you might not know God, or you'd have to take people at their word for what they tell you about Him - even if it was wrong. How would you draw closer to a distant, unknown God who loves you? You simply couldn't get a very deep relationship with Him without access to His Word.

Why am I having you Imagine 

your world like this?

Because this is the way it is for many around the globe. Many who have not heard. Many who have no access or if they do, they can not read what they have access to.

This is the world of people in my village-town in West Africa. The Konyanka have no Bible. No alphabet. No way to read it if they did.

Our family is headed to 

West Africa to live and work among the Konyanka. We plan to learn their language, develop a working writing system, and teach the people to read their own language while translating the Bible. It will be hard. It will take years. We will have to adapt to a bunch of new things - a whole new way of life. Is it going to be worth it?

I often write what I feel strongly about, so I apologize if sometimes it sounds like I am scared, or frustrated, or disappointed in what I may have to give up or do in order to live and serve in Africa. I often need a reminder - a good kick in the pants helps too!
It will cost me something, but it will be worth it.

It will be worth it to bring the Bible to the Konyanka people and teach them how to read in their own language. It will be worth it so that my African friends can know God. Our president at Pioneer Bible Translators (PBT) often reminds us,  "It will be worth it". 

PS-
 Photo credits disclaimer: All clip arts I use are royalty free. If I "borrow" a photo from somewhere else, I give credit to the original source; however, I do not recall whom to credit for the Rev. 7 photo. Sorry! Also, please ask before posting pics from my blog. Thanks. 

Love and Apt. Living LINKS! :)

I love when I find a new blog like La vie en rose - It's right up my alley! It's French & so my style! I figured you all might enjoy it too.


Side Note:  I found her on Pinterest. I know you haven't seen me pin anything lately (Sorry!), but I've found a faster way for me to "surf" Pinterest - basically it involves me not even signing in and just clicking on pins from their sign-in page to open them in new tabs (then I go straight to the blog link on the pin, and voila!) If I were to pin as much as I like on there, I would end up at the end of the internet and the house would be a wreck!

Here's the two really good links I've found which will be interesting to....

1. People who like Free Dates (think it's good for singles even though it says how to "Spice up your marriage" - in my case, I'm dating my spouse). http://laviediy.blogspot.com/2011/10/diy-spice-up-your-marriage-free-or.html 
2. People interested in How to Jazz Up Apartment Living.   http://laviediy.blogspot.com/p/apartment-living.html

I love these because, let's face it, even missionaries need a bit of spice in their lives! *wink*

Signs of Spring! Mostly Picture Post

Beauty reflects the Creator.

Remember we're made in His image.

Get a whiff of that goodness!

Fun with family - love my sister-in-law, Carrie!

Easter at Great Grandparents House in NJ.

The Matriarch - Grammy Brollier

A Happy Hunter.

Love the Cheese! (And who says you need professional portraits?)

Proof I was at Easter dinner.

So, one year for Easter we made resurrection rolls (you can google them for the recipe) to illustrate how the Son of God was resurrected from death to life. The kids loved this object lesson of hiding a marshmallow tucked in a crescent roll. When it's baked it's gone! Just like an empty tomb. Although, our kids liked the lesson a bit too much, and since we don't do sweets often the kids kept asking when we were going to bury "baby" Jesus (my now 4 year old always thinks of Jesus as a baby). They just wanted the treat, but I'm sure they will never forget the lesson. Well, this year we, of course, talked about the real meaning, but also had an Easter Egg Hunt - no object lesson this time! There's something innocent about gathering candy-filled eggs in a basket and looking forward to opening them. I wish every chapter of life were like this. The excitement of the hunt and the prize. The joy of ownership and the savoring the prize hidden inside. Mmm.  Maybe more of life should be like this. Maybe it is all about perspective. We, as believers, are earthen vessels who contain the mystery of Christ. Easter eggs - Not a perfect analogy, but it's just some points to ponder along with the pics.

Change & Coping

I feel like a different me than when I set out a year ago.

The New me. The good with the bad and getting through big things.

What have I accomplished?
I've lived in another culture for a year.
I've learned a language.
I've helped my kids navigate public school relationships in another language and culture.
I've worshiped our Father in another language and shared about Him too.
I've traveled entirely too much.
I've dealt with chronic back pain and fatigue.
I've grieved lost time with my dad, knowing he might die of cancer.
I've dealt with stress.
I've had my ups and my downs.
I've become much more introverted - weird. (Those of you who knew me before might not believe this possible, but I've realized the benefit and the joy that comes from holding my tongue! It's so energizing to not be the center of attention now.)
I've become more appreciative. Really.
I've changed - too much to note each detail, but it's there, and I can feel it and maybe you can see it too - or maybe you can't.

Everyone asks how my trip was - unless they understand it was not a trip but my life for a year. (It's ok, really. I like sharing. I get it.)

I came home from France and waded through my thoughts and emotions of transitioning from my home culture of a year to my changed home culture in the States.


Life in the great USA is still great, but it is different.
I can't explain to you why, but I'll try.:
Maybe it's the busy that people hold as more important than time with family and friends.
Maybe it's that people are willing to check out from society by putting in their ear buds.

Maybe it's the technology. Everyone checking their $200 phones (or in my case a borrowed flip-phone - I have to adapt to culture even a bit, don't I? or my borrowed iTouch.)

Side Note:
I had to laugh at the fact that when I was visiting my family we were all playing a game against each other on our devices while we were in the same room! We were playing games just like we used to only this time it was without pencil and paper and it was called  "Draw Something" instead of Pictionary. (I thought this was fine since we had all thoroughly connected verbally for days as we visited Dad in Hospice and consoled each other - so we got our "Face Time" in *wink*).

Life here in the US is just faster, and I am amazed at how much we eat here in such little time.
In France, we ate well, but it was over many hours - not a marathon Thanksgiving stuff your face kind of meal, but a little of this and a lot of conversation. (Don't get me wrong - I love Thanksgiving!)
Here we also would grab a meal on the run and eat it in the car - why?? It's so much messier that way and a lot less enjoyable.
I miss walking and biking everywhere in France. Do people do that here? I find things are way too far away to make that work well. How dependent we are on fuel.

Anyway, life is different for me since my experiences have increased.  
Life is different for me now that my dad is gone. (I'm so thankful we were able to be with him before he passed away).

I've dealt with just a little bit of what my mom went through as my father's caregiver. I was able to help out for a few days as his sole caregiver while she was working, and I did not envy my mom's job of his full-time caregiver. For those of you out there who deal with that on a daily basis. I understand you. You are not alone. I felt so alone and lost trying to do what was best for dad in my human strength. When we're tired and worn, we sometimes forget to look to the One who cares for us.

1Peter 5:7 : Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 

I know I forgot to do that at times. If you are trying to cope with giving your all for your loved one, I encourage you to find someone to talk and cry with (Thanks Brent!). A friend, a caregivers' support group, a church cell group.  It helps. 

It's hard to see your loved one fail. To see their health decline and their mind go - to see time shift and slip from their reach while your life keeps blurring by. (I encourage you to look into respite care at a Hospice house if your loved one has a terminal disease and  care-giving gets to be too much.) It doesn't make you love them any less if you get help. 

I had to get creative with how I processed all that was going on. 

I needed to be alone a lot more.
I needed quiet. 
I needed to veg out in front of the TV so that I wouldn't dwell on it and hyperventilate. (I have had panic attacks over the past year - gee I wonder why!) My dad's life was slipping away - his skin could not keep his soul in his body any longer. 
I needed to cry. I still do.
I needed to draw again. 
Oddly enough I did not want to be with friends or talk on the phone about it. I was avoiding processing that part with anyone other than my family members (it was just to much to explain over and over.)
I needed to be with my kids sometimes and pour into them to fill the lack that I know the years ahead will hold. They are grieving too.

It's weird to think that I fit into a category now: 
Fatherless. 
I'm 32 and I no longer have a dad. My mom is a widow. 
When does this sort of thing happen? 
You never see it coming even when you have a year and a half to prepare after prognosis. 

Deut. 10:17-18 : 17For the Lord your God is God of gods and Lord of lords, the great God, mighty and awesome, who shows no partiality and accepts no bribes. 18He defends the cause of the fatherless and the widow, and loves the alien, giving him food and clothing.  

It's nice to know we will be taken care of.

I'm getting to the place where I understand the beauty of a life after this one.  Life everlasting is the HOPE that I can cling to when life on this earth gets me down. I'm so thankful that it is available to me and to you.

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. ¹⁷ For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.  (From John 3:16-17)

This Easter, I received a little gift from our Father.

I had a vision while I was wide awake. In my mind's eye I could see my dad. 

In this vision, he looked like himself but had the disposition of a little child. He was standing next to Jesus and he asked, "Hey, do those holes in your hands and feet still hurt?" Jesus told him, "Not anymore. They are scars of joy now." Then he hugged my dad and my dad grinned the most contented grin I have never seen him have in his entire life (and my dad laughed a lot!). What a treasure that I will always cherish: to know that there is joy and release from pain and sorrow waiting for those of us who trust in Him when we walk from life into eternity. 

This is how I cope.